2nd church was a bible church – I didn’t (and don’t) know what that means, but it was part of their name and certainly part of their identity. They interpreted the Bible literally. (1st church viewed Scripture as inerrant and infallible, but there was room to marry Creation with evolution. At 2nd church, the earth was 6,000 years old.)
I attended this church during the first two years of college, along with Campus Crusade (CRU) friends. I remember the pastor one time quoting G.K. Chesterton, who apparently said, “The point of an open mind is to close it on something solid.” This made a lot of sense to me at the time, and reinforced the notion that I had discovered the truth (the absolute truth!) and could take great comfort in that. It also suggested that there was no need to remain open to alternative ways of thinking/believing, after all, I had already arrived.
2nd church was more “churchy” that 1st church – it had its own building, it had pews, it had a fellowship hall where I ate many potato salads and bowls of chili. It was a small congregation, couldn’t have been more than 100 people on its busiest Sunday, and had a homey feel. There was a solo pastor and he was very passionate (read: a little scary sometimes). I remember leaving church one time and seeing someone holding political (Republican) lawn signs in the foyer. I thought this was very strange. I’m not sure if I thought it was wrong at the time, but I definitely felt it was foreign. What did God have to do with politics? Why did this person care how I voted?
Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart // Naught me all else to me, save that Thou art // Thou my best thought by day or by night // Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light. – Traditional hymn
3rd church was a huge EPC church that was also in my college town; I attended there for the second half of college. I had become disillusioned with CRU and didn’t attend any college ministry with much regularly while I was in nursing school – although, part of that was because I was in nursing school – I barely had time to eat and sleep. But it was also because the college ministries felt a little too…rigid, and some of the people in them a little too…annoying. But I enjoyed becoming part of 3rd church, and even decided to do so more intentionally – I signed up for the 6-week membership class.
This was an every-Wednesday-night deal, with pizza and doctrine, after which you could become a member. I’ll never forget one of the classes in the middle there – it was about unconditional election, and it explained the Calvinist belief that God predestines some people for salvation and other people for destruction. Put more plainly: God decides ahead of time which people get saved and which people go to Hell, and there’s nothing that humans can do to affect this cosmic sorting. I was really taken aback by this: So why did we pray for people to be saved, then? If God had already decided their eternal destiny, what was the point?
I went ahead and finished the class, but I didn’t became a member. I certainly continued attending, and, for the most part, loved the church. I didn’t agree with their stance on election and predestination – I thought it was scary and inconceivable that God could be so evil – but I also didn’t think it mattered that I didn’t agree with them. Like, so what? I could just keep my thoughts to myself.
I was the college kid who just walked into the dining hall kitchen area to get myself a new utensil or to find the Kelloggs when the self-serve bin was empty. (Another student asked me one time to get something for him when I did this, assuming I worked there. I gave him a weird look which he promptly returned.) The point is that I’ve always considered rules and barriers loosely. There’s a door here? I’ll go through it. There’s a wall here? I’ll go around it. I enjoyed worshipping at 3rd church despite not being on board with everything they believed. It never occurred to me that it was an issue. I took the good, I discarded the bad.
I had a friend though who attended the classes with me, and she was irate when this theology was revealed. She left that class in a huff and never returned to the church again. In equal parts I admired her passion and was confused why she couldn’t overlook it.
I stayed at 3rd church until I moved away from my college town, about three years total. It was a huge place, hundreds of people at 4 or 5 weekend services, and full of well-dressed college students and young families. There was a coffee shop inside its walls, along with a bookstore that housed conservative reading material, and the male pastors (always male) wore jeans on stage and talked about their hot wives. The church believed in “love the sinner, hate the sin” when it came to LGBTQ people, had a very effective marketing strategy to the community, and had a loud, talented worship team that utilized a lot of lighting techniques. In other words, it was very evangelical and very Reformed.
Heal my heart and make it clean // Open up my eyes to the things unseen // Show me how to love like you have loved me // Break my heart for what breaks yours // Everything I am for your kingdom’s cause // As I walk from earth into eternity // Hosanna, Hosanna // Hosanna in the highest // Hosanna, Hosanna // Hosanna in the highest! – Hillsong United
Photo credits in order:
- Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash
- Photo by Alan Hardman on Unsplash
- Photo by Greyson Joralemon on Unsplash
